If you’re a new or soon-to-be stay-at-home parent, I’d like to share with you my top sanity-saving tip.
A little over two years ago, I made the decision to quit my full-time job and stay home with my two young children. Being a SAHM was something I had been daydreaming about since becoming a mother; after my son was born, I never wanted to return to work in the first place. But I dropped off my kids day after day and dragged myself to work in order to pay the bills — even though I barely brought money home with the price of childcare and gas for my long commute.
Then the stars aligned. I was presented with the opportunity to kickoff my freelance writing career.
A huge weight was lifted off my shoulders when I walked out of the office on my last day. And the first week of being a SAHM was amazing. No early-morning rush, no pumping breast milk and no lump-in-throat goodbyes as I left my children and headed to work each morning. I was so, so grateful to start this new chapter in our lives. Until the honeymoon phase ended and reality set in.
Because here’s the truth about being a SAH parent: It’s not all rainbows and butterflies. It’s freaking hard.
With no routine to dictate our time, the hours painfully crept by most days. I would attempt to get some writing done while one or both of the kids were awake. (Ha! Scratch that idea.) I tried to engage with them every second of the day — only to look at the clock and what seemed like hours of interaction turned out to be 20 minutes. The monotony of preparing meals, cleaning up from meals, naps, entertaining/keeping little ones alive and trying to keep the house from looking like a tornado just hit was soul-sucking. Isolation, desperation and depression slowly settled into my bones.
That is, until I found my answer to surviving this whole SAHM gig: Make it a point to get out of the house every singe day.
That’s it, honestly. Even if it’s just a trip to Target to walk around, a visit to the library or a stroll around your neighborhood. Do it.
Grab a cup of coffee at McDonald’s and let the kiddos play on the indoor playground. Drive to nearby fitness center and let them run wild in the gymnasium for 15 minutes. (My gym has complimentary coffee and babysitting, too! Triple win.)
Meet friends at their home for a play date. Go to the park. Just. Get. Out. Of. The. House.
It doesn’t have to be for very long. You don’t have to spend any money. Just breathe some fresh air in a setting that isn’t your home. Give yourself an opportunity to socialize with other adults, even if it’s just a “good morning” in passing, or small talk about the weather. Believe me, it can go a long way.
This simple tip practically saved my sanity in my fledgling days of SAH parenting. It helped to break up our day. It eventually sparked a routine that allowed my (now three!) kids to anticipate how our days would play out. And best of all? I’m a better, happier mom for it.
What tips do you have for new SAH parents? What’s the hardest part for you, if you stay at home?
Share your thoughts!