Hi, I’m a stay-at-home mom. And now, you know everything about me.
That’s how many people act once they find out “I don’t work.” Immediately, their assumptions about me, and my life, fall perfectly into place, like pre-motherhood boobs.
Some of their assumptions are probably right. I do live in jeans. And I’m kind of excellent at vacuuming. And I really, truly love being a mom.
But I can assure you that on most things, people are way off. And I am as sick of their misconceptions, as I am of hashtags. So please, please stop assuming…
That I stay home because I don’t need to work. Um, I’m sorry. But how exactly do you know what our financial situation is? Oh, that’s right! You do our bills, and have our online banking passwords. You don’t? Then presuming to know anything about what sacrifices we’ve had to make for our arrangement to work, is just stupid. Everyone’s situation is different. This is ours. And you don’t know the first thing about it.
That I don’t work. How exactly do you know whether I work, or don’t? Just because you see me at preschool drop off in the mornings, wearing yoga pants doesn’t mean anything. Maybe I work from home. Maybe I work on the weekends, or in the evenings. Maybe I made a million bucks in college writing code for Facebook. Maybe I’m huge in Singapore! In any case, don’t assume I am not making a financial contribution to our family, be it big or small.
That I’m 100 percent happy about my choice to stay home. You may think I’ve got it so easy. That I wake up every morning, and think, “Geez, I’m so glad I don’t have to go to work today.” Well, sometimes, I do. But trust me, there are mornings I would do anything to get on a bus, or a train, or in a car, and commute somewhere, anywhere, just to get away from whatever horrible, awful phase one of my kids is going through. In fact, I question my choice to be home all the time. Because I know there is another life out there I could be living. I don’t know if it would be better, or worse. Some day, I might find out. Or maybe I won’t. The point is, I question my decisions as much as moms who go to work each day.
I know people make assumptions about working moms, too. We all look at others and think we know what their life is like. Most of the time, we’re probably not even close.
What do people assume about you that is just wrong?
Share hereThings SAHMs NEVER do:
Try to give ourselves brain damage and permanent hearing loss.
Will steam to come out of our ears, while wearing sponges as accessories. So chic!
Wear an apron!?!
Fold baby clothes with an expression on our face like we just found out we won $1 million!
Make muffins while talking on a phone from 1997???
Think we’re hot stuff while dusting? "Please, no autographs until I'm done with the mantle."
Set dinner on fire and not let go of the pan.
Hug laundry and gaze out the window forlornly. Please, we do that while sipping wine, at noon, and eating bonbons. With our feet up.
Count doing dishes as a workout.
Wear a chef’s hat. And seriously, what's up with the apron??
Vacuum in heels. ENOUGH WITH THE APRONS!!!
Mix up doing dishes with being in a photo shoot for Vogue.
